Before having children, everyone tells you about how your topics of conversation will change. Bodily fluids and let’s be honest, solids, will no longer be barred from dinner talk. In fact they’ll probably be top of mind. 

But what you don’t prepare yourself for is the amount of time spent picking and prodding at the vast array substances created by your little bundle of joy. 

Ear wax. Why do babies create so much ear wax?! The little caramel coloured balls that gather in their ears.

Boggies. I don’t know what the medical term is but my little one seems to have a lot. The flicker back and forth when he’s happy or upset, teasing me to try and catch them. Every time I think I’ve got it, it just bounces back into the depths of his little nostrils. I persevere for what seems like an age (once he’s crying I might as well carry on…) until finally it is mine! Delicately caught between fingernails, I pull at it gently to find it is HUGE! I don’t know how he is able to breath with that thing up there.

Cradle cap. Now I know the experts say there’s no need to pick at it, but it is soooo addictive. When you’ve spent half an hour with a baby on your boob, you need some entertainment. It’s starts with the odd flake that looks like it’s about to fall off. Before you know it, your baby’s shoulders and your lap are covered in dry flakes. 

I realise this is a bit of a gross, if not random post, but I’m sure most new parents will secretly agree. 

Keep on picking 😉